My father is a gossip, swears a lot, and can be quite offensive, but as with all fathers he has his moments of humor (he thinks they happen more often than they do). So here they are:
"I feel that potatoes are highly overrated."
(He really hates potatoes.)
"There's only one way in this town-- and that's the wrong way! Hahahaha!"
(This is true.)
"I'd buy anything for $15.... Anything."
(He needs shopaholics anonymous. To elaborate on this he bought me two penguin doormats because I like penguins and they were just so cheap. But don't be distracted by the kindness of this action. He bought his 17 year old daughter not one but two door mats. Who does that?)
"I mean really, who names their kid Mitt? What's that short for Mitten? So, what's his brother's name? Glove?"
(Valid argument padre, valid indeed.)
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